In Praise of Contador

Much like his native Spain’s World Cup victory, Alberto Contador’s 2010 Tour de France wasn’t pretty or overpowering. However, it still produced the winning formula, and a ceremonial stroll down the Champs-Elysees to claim his third Tour de France is all that remains.

He will ride through the streets of Paris, drinking champagne and savoring the ultimate prize – one final yellow jersey ceremony. He won’t cross the line first, but it won’t matter. He has yet to claim a stage victory over the course of three grueling weeks (the first champion since 1990 to be shut out), but his dominance still shone through when it mattered most.

That ability to seize the moment when it came before him will surely be of comfort during future struggles; this was supposed to be a preordained win, yet his chances often seemed to rest on shakier footing than the cobblestones upon which he rode.

He struggled to a sluggish sixth-place finish in the opening prologue and then bled out time before reeling in 2009 runner-up Andy Schleck. Even his seizure of the yellow jersey left more questions than answers. His attack in stage 15 coincided with a Schleck mechanical error that Contador (perhaps rightly) claimed he never saw. He endured his fair share of criticism for the supposed breach of Tour etiquette, but few pointed out the minute of time that Contador lost when Schleck attacked in stage 3 with many of the favorites impeded by a crash pileup.

The eight seconds that separated them set the stage for the most significant stage of the Tour, a torturous “Beyond Category” climb up the Col du Tourmalet in stage 17. Schleck all but conceded beforehand that he would need to take back the yellow jersey plus a minute of cushion to fend off Contador in the time trial of the Tour’s penultimate stage.

The five-hour long stage featured more foreplay and time killing than “The Decision,” but unlike LeBron’s snoozefest, the last hour produced some of the most compelling drama in the race’s 97-year history.

With roughly six miles to go, Schleck made his move, driving forward and bringing Contador with him up the misty mountaintop. The scene was nearly primal – no barriers to contain the masses of costumed fans who crept dangerously close to the pair as they churned onward. Flags waved, horns honked, voices screamed and the fog grew so thick that it forced cameramen to repeatedly wipe their lenses. If ever there was a place to decide a championship, this was it.

Contador didn’t need to win, but he couldn’t afford to be dropped. Schleck, on the other hand, was in go-for-broke mode, emptying his arsenal in an attempt to crack the defending champion and leave him broken on the mountainside.

For ages they stayed together, Schleck surging forward and varying the pace. At one point, Contador attacked, but it was more speculative than aggressive. After Schleck quickly chased him down, the Spaniard seemed content to sit on his foe’s wheel for the remainder of the ascent.

And so they arrived at the summit, locked together, a victory for Contador and a huge blow to his challenger. Contador, in a show of sportsmanship, allowed Schleck to take the stage win, perhaps as an apology for the incident that occurred only days before. It was a sporting gesture, and certainly repayment enough.

Just as suspected, Contador dug further into the lead in Saturday’s time trial, gaining 21 seconds on Schleck and locking up his third title.

Sunday’s ride will be a coronation that will offer up an unspoken challenge to the sport’s gold standard: Armstrong’s seven titles.

Contador is 27 years old and just now hitting his stride, three Tours in hand. For some perspective, Armstrong won his first at age 28. From 2007 to present, he has entered five Grand Tours – three Tours de France, one Giro d’Italia and one Vuelta a Espana.

He won them all.

Armstrong, meanwhile, owes his former teammate an apology. He spent the 2009 Tour whining like a petulant schoolchild, had Contador carry him to a third-place finish, and then pulled the stunt of stunts to form his own team.

Where’s Lance?

40 minutes back. One year removed from a spot on the podium.

Cycling is a sport increasingly prone to… cycles. Indurain won five Tours, as did Merckx, Hinault, and Anquetil. Armstrong won seven. And now Contador has won three.

That kernel of knowledge lives in Andy Schleck, and will surely haunt his dreams. For every Affirmed, winner of the 1978 Triple Crown, there is an Alydar, who finished second in all three races by a combined margin of less than three lengths. For every Lance Armstrong, there is a Jan Ullrich, who owns five second-place finishes in the Tour.

This was Contador at his weakest, and he still found a way to haul himself up the mountains and grind through the time trials. He did it when it mattered.

Can he get eight?

Don’t bet against it.

Oranje Crush

I love the Dutch.

There’s really no other way to put it.

As an American soccer fan, it’s almost unquestioned that there has to be a second team. One day, that won’t be the case. But for now, somebody has to fill the gap each time our collection of futbol neophytes is excused from competition in yet another painstaking fashion.

In times past, those teams have been Mexico (for their passion) and Italy (for their brilliance in finding ways to win). And while I’ve been as devoted as any polygamist could be to his second wife, there have been numerous realizations that seem to cool the flames of fandom rather than stoke them. Namely, in the case of Mexico, the facts that their fans love to throw cups and bags full of urine and vomit on American players. During the game. Or, in Italy’s case, the fact that they seem hell-bent on turning The Beautiful Game into a diving competition. Put any of those 10 field players on springboard in London two years from now and we’ll be cueing up the Italian national anthem after they take the gold medal.

In short, the second marriage has been… lacking.

I am the world’s worst cheater.

Enter the Dutch – with their ostentatious color scheme, remarkable fans, beautiful soccer, fantastic nicknames and general all-around sexiness.

I’m smitten.

Start with the orange – or oranje, I should say. The color is beautiful to behold en masse. It’s garish and jolting. My first experience with it came from the Winter Olympics years ago. The Dutch clearly drew the short straw when sporting dominance was being distributed. America got baseball, Brazil got soccer, India got cricket, New Zealand got rugby, Canada got hockey. The Dutch have long track speed skating. Bless them. But there they were in Nagano, Japan, filling the entire arena in a giant orange wave, blowing horns (no, not those), waving flags, and generally raising hell that should never be raised in such a venue, especially more than 5,000 miles away from the motherland.

That particular party was thrown to watch competitors skate 25 laps on an icy track, two at a time. Imagine a soccer game on the world’s biggest stage, in a place that they used to own. (No, really, look it up. They owned Cape Town. Sore subject there.) It’s wild, to say the least. They’re the fun of Brazil minus the Samba, Mexico minus the piss balloons, England minus the bitching and moaning. Paaaaaarty.

And then there’s the nicknames, an infinite array of possibilities. The simple Oranje, the Americanized Orange Crush, Orange Alert and Clockwork Orange. The Flying Dutchmen. There are the cheers – “Hup Hup!” It’s all beautiful. The player names are equally glorious, with more vans than a pedophile convention. Van Bronckhorst. Van der Vaart. Van Persie. Van de Wiel. On and on… wonderful.

Lastly, the on-field product has an interesting – baffling, really – history. The Netherlands showed up at the second and third World Cups (ready to party, no doubt) and didn’t make it out of the first round either time. From there, they missed out on the next six tournaments, until the mid-1970s, when they played the best soccer anyone has played in the history of the game. Total Football, as it was called, relied on the 10 field players (minus the keeper) being able to rotate to any position at any point in the game. The Dutch mastered it, and in today’s world of specialization, nobody will ever play it as well as they did during those years. Unfortunately, they ran into the dirty little secret of the World Cup – the home team wins. In 1974 and 1978, they lost in the finals to the hosts – West Germany first, Argentina second. They promptly fell back off the face of the Earth, failing to qualify for the next two editions.

However, they are currently in a revival of the glory days, having made the semi-finals in 1998 and the knockout stage in 2006. They deserve the star above the crest that comes with World Cup glory more than any other country without one. If they beat Spain, they’ll be the first team in the history of the Cup to make it through seven games undefeated and untied. It will be a monumental achievement.

Nike began the Cup with a Write Your Story advertising campaign. It featured their star teams and players – Brazil (bounced by the Dutch), Ronaldinho (didn’t make the team), Ronaldo (one goal), Rooney (goalless). The Dutch are a Nike team. Nothing. Not one second in a three-minute commercial.

Here’s hoping they write their story today.

Tomorrow’s headline – Hup, Hup Hooray!

Power Rankings - Round of 16

THE CONTENDERS

1. Argentina – Unquestionably the class of the tournament thus far. Even more intriguing considering their coach leaves them susceptible to a world-class meltdown at any moment, but that’s not been the case in South Africa.

2. Brazil – It’s not the visually intoxicating style and flair that we’ve been accustomed to, but Dunga’s defensive-minded squad gets results.

3. Spain – A wretched start defined by missed chances, but the favorites rebounded to take back two wins in impressive fashion.

ALSO LURKING

4. Netherlands – The scoring isn’t there, but the results are. Major test will come with Brazil lurking in the quarterfinals, but can’t afford to look past Slovakia just yet.

5. Germany – Their road is not the easiest, but their solid play could provide the winning counter to England and Argentina’s inconsistencies. We’ll need to see more of the squad that routed Australia if they’re going to make another deep run.

6. Uruguay – One of two teams to not allow a goal in their first three games. They have a great path to the semifinals, and with a defense capable of stalling any offense until penalty kicks if necessary, anything can happen from there.

DARK HORSES

7. United States – With an ideal path to the semis, this could be uncharted territory for the Americans. Something about this squad seems special, though, and a top-four finish isn’t out of the question at this point.

8. Portugal – I’m not sold on them, despite that walloping they handed to North Korea. Too much of the awful soccer they played in the matches that sandwiched their win.

9. England – Didn’t look too good in their first three games, but managed to get a result that averted the apocalypse. Their matchup against the Germans could be an all-time classic if both sides play to their potential.

10. Mexico – Extremely unfortunate to draw Argentina in this round for the second straight World Cup. However, it took the goal of the tournament in 2006 to get rid of the Mexicans, and they could very well be up to the task Sunday.

11. Paraguay – Winners of the shoddiest group in the tourney, but they did what they had to do to advance. Hard to count out any of the South Americans after the way they dominated the group stage.

PACK YOUR BAGS

12. South Korea – Impressive play to finish off Nigeria, but I can’t see them beating an extremely strong South American side in Uruguay.

13. Chile – Might have played their way out of the tournament with a dreadful result against Spain. The loss relegated them to a faceoff against Brazil and a discipline meltdown means that they’ll be playing without three starters.

14. Japan – Keisuke Honda has been one of the better stories of the tournament, and Japan takes set pieces as well as anyone. Could end up in the quarterfinals, but that’s a best-case scenario.

15. Ghana – The Great African Hope will need an offensive spark to beat the United States. Two goals in three games, both coming from penalty kicks.

16. Slovakia – Their one contribution to the knockout stage will be the absence of those diving Italians. Thanks for playing, boys.

Five thoughts - Knocked Out edition

No more ties…

Soccer haters, rejoice! The World Cup has reached the bracket-style, knockout phase of the tournament. From this moment forward, all games will have a winner. The sudden-death golden goal format was abandoned in 2002 in favor of two mandatory 15-minute overtime periods, but excitement still lives in the form of penalty kicks. Well, unless you’re from England. The Three Lions have been excused from the World Cup in 1990, 1998, and 2006 after losing on penalties.

Spain won when it counted…

Their stay in South Africa couldn’t have gotten off to a rockier start and looked to be much shorter than anyone imagined after a loss to Switzerland. However, the reigning champions of Europe kept their cool with a clinical wins over Honduras and 10-man Chile. Those victories, couple with a Swiss choke against Honduras, put Spain at the top of Group H. Instead of having to run the gauntlet against Brazil/Netherlands, Spain will face off against Portugal in a battle of Iberian supremacy.

Chile had a discipline nightmare…

Honestly, perhaps the problem was their tournament-leading nine yellow cards against Switzerland. That disgrace led to Friday’s bloodbath in which only three people were shown cards but all three earned suspensions for the next game against Brazil. Perhaps they should take a lesson from the Spanish. While Chile leads the Cup with 12 yellow cards, Spain has amazingly not been booked a single time in three games.

Switzerland couldn’t do what it took…

To quote John Candy in Cool Runnings (a wordsmith, for sure): “It was there for the taking, and you choked.” There’s no better way to describe a Swiss side that notched a goal against Spain but couldn’t find the back of the net against Honduras, of all teams. A convincing win – anything more than a goal, really – would have been enough to extend their stay, but they never came close. If anything, Honduras is the team finding itself ruing missed chances in that contest. Typical Switzerland.

South America gets the clean sweep…

Five South American teams qualified for South Africa and all five are through to the knockout stage after an extremely impressive performance that saw them lose only one of 15 group matches (the aforementioned Chilean nightmare). Europe, by contrast, advanced six teams out of a possible 13. A Chile-Brazil matchup will guarantee an end to South America’s perfect stay, but the continent could still manage three teams in the semifinals.

Five thoughts - Arrivederci, Italia! edition

1. Italy deserved what they got…

Italy was getting old in 2006 when they became champions. In 2008, they were on their last legs. And yet, in 2010, Marcello Lippi acted as if he’d found the fountain of youth, stubbornly sticking with the same squad that wasn’t getting any younger. Of the 11 players on the field today, five were born before 1980. Their failure to develop a suitable backup for 32-year-old Gianliugi Buffon will haunt them. Backup Federico Marchetti became the first Italy goalkeeper to give up three goals in a World Cup game since 1970, when the Italians coughed up four against a Brazil team widely considered to be one of the greatest teams ever.

The inability to restock a roster coming off World Cup glory has been a problem in recent years. After winning in 1998, France finished at the bottom of its group in 2002 while failing to score a single goal. Brazil’s letdown after its 2002 title wasn’t nearly as great, but the team’s quarterfinal loss marked its earliest exit since 1990. This year, however, takes the cake. For the first time in the tournament’s history, both the defending champion and runner-up failed to make it out of the group stage.

2. Party like it’s 2002…

Both Japan and South Korea were relative newcomers to the game when they were selected to host the Cup in 2002. Neither had ever cracked the knockout round previously. However, both were able to avoid South Africa’s misfortune; in fact, both teams won their respective groups. The Koreans in particular were a revelation, advancing all the way to the semifinals en route to a fourth-place finish at home. Neither team was able to repeat its luck in 2006, but they’ve both bounced back to grab spots in the Round of 16 once more. In total, it looks as though nine teams that survived the group stage in 2002 will be back for more in 2010. That list includes two more teams that weren’t around at this point in the 2006 Cup – Paraguay and the United States.

3. New Zealand proved they belong…

The fact that the All-Whites got to a point where simply scoring a goal in their final match would have won them the group that included the defending champions is nothing short of miraculous. Ultimately, they couldn’t eek out one last miracle and instead settled for their third draw (and point) of the tournament. That being said, it’s still impressive that a squad generously listed at 1500-1 odds to win the World Cup went three games without a loss and finished above Italy in the group standings. It will probably cost them their coach, though. Ricki Herbert, who makes only $50,000 (as opposed to Fabio Capellos $6,000,000+ salary), will surely be off to a much more lucrative club job that won’t allow him to coach the national team as well.

4. North Korea and Honduras might get it bad Friday…

The communist whipping boys of Group G are going to the wrong place if they’re looking for compassion in the wake of a 7-goal thrashing at the hands of Portugal. Ivory Coast will need to match that number, if not more, in order to advance over Ronaldo and co. on goal differential. It’s no guarantee that they’ll be nearly as effective, but they’ll certainly be doing everything in their power to score goals at the expense of the North Koreans.

Honduras is a similar story. Switzerland might need to pile it on in order to ensure advancement in a scenario that could see Spain, Switzerland, and Chile tied with Spain and Switzerland wins. That would leave three teams tied for two spots, and the Swiss have the easiest route to the top in facing the punchless Hondurans. It’s a cruel world, but goals are the currency of advancement at the World Cup.

5. We’ll see who wants it most when it counts…

Brazil and Portugal face off to determine the winner of Group G. It’ll be interesting to see if Portugal plays for the win that would give them the group title or is content to sit back and play for a tie that would guarantee the knockout stage. It would take a big loss to bring elimination into play, so they’re probably fine in that regard. If the two sides come out with guns blazing, it’ll be a great indicator of where the teams stand heading into the final phase of the tournament.

The other crucial match involves Spain and Chile. Spain should be a favorite to win, but Chile has played the best soccer of the group so far. A Chilean victory would likely do the unthinkable, knocking out the pre-tournament favorites in the early stages and adding Spain to the list of Euro heartbreak along with France and Italy.

Five thoughts - Landycakes scores! edition

1. The Americans find a way…

It’s not the biggest win in USA soccer history, but it’s close. Unlike the Nigerians, who seemed to throw away chances at every possible opportunity, the Yanks have found a way to advance at the top of Group C despite having two legitimate goals disallowed in the past two games. The never-say-die attitude of this team can be summed up in one stat: Over the course of three games, the United States had a lead for a grand total of two minutes. The previous low for a team that won its group was 21 minutes, but this one will be impossible to top.

It is truly fitting that the goal came from Landon Donovan, who we can now say is truly the face of American soccer and the best to ever wear the colors. He (deservingly) bore the burden of the blame for the 2006 disgrace, so it’s only fair that he get the credit for two of the more important goals in America’s World Cup history. The goal against Slovenia that pulled the U.S. from the brink of elimination was pure quality, but his stoppage-time winner against Algeria is one for the ages.

Bob Bradley has been great for his players so far. With so many teams in disarray or dissension, the United States has looked remarkably poised, confident and unified. Despite a defense that can’t go 10 minutes to start a match without giving up a golden opportunity, his side has never panicked, and his substitutions in each game have been remarkably sage. Most soccer fans will admit to not always understanding or agreeing with his decisions, but he’s proved that in big tournaments he can coach against the best.

2. USA will never have an easier road to the semis…

Who would you rather face to get to the semifinals, Ghana and Uruguay or Germany and Argentina? This route is the best possible scenario to befall the Americans short of Australia advancing from Group D, which was never a true possibility after a 4-0 thrashing. Neither team will be easy to beat, as is the case this late in the tourney, but they also won’t be the powerhouses lurking elsewhere in the bracket.

Ghana is an interesting matchup. What first comes to mind is the possibility of revenge for the group stage finale in 2006 that saw Ghana defeat USA to advance and send the Americans home winless. The winning goal came on a controversial penalty kick awarded just before the half. It looks like more of the same in 2010, as Ghana’s two goals have both come from the penalty spot. While this could be good news for a shaky USA back line, keep in mind that the Yanks have already been shattered twice by incomprehensible officiating decisions. With Ghana now representing the Great African Hope, it will be up to the US players to ensure they stay clear of seeing red in this match.

3. England-Germany will be the biggest matchup so far…

This could change if Spain finishes second in Group H and has to face Brazil, but right now England-Germany looks to be the class of the knockout round. Germany demonstrated its capabilities in a convincing opening win that featured a four-goal outburst. The Three Lions, by contrast, have yet to play their best soccer. It’s no secret that there’s no love lost between the two teams and countries (something about a war?), and England’s sole World Cup win came at the expense of the Germans. As an added bonus, both squads will be near full strength as Germany avoided any knockout-round suspensions despite five players carrying yellow cards into their final group match.

4. Africa can breathe easy now…

South Africa had to suffer the indignity of becoming the first host country to bow out in the opening round. Cameroon failed to match expectations when they were the first team bounced from the tournament. Ivory Coast never recovered from a devastating injury that left superstar Didier Drogba a shell of his dominant self. Nigeria self destructed in every possible way. Algeria failed to score a goal and are currently on the second-longest goal drought in World Cup history. Egypt, the continent’s best team, suffered a nightmare stretch in qualifying that left them out of the competition entirely. But none of that matters now. Ghana rose up and snatched a spot in the final 16, ensuring that an entire continent wouldn’t be left barren in the tournament’s most meaningful stages.

5. Burnt out? Tomorrow’s the day to fix that…

Tired of watching soccer all day, every day? Stop. For one day only. It’ll be for your own good. Thursday’s matchups are a horror slate in terms of entertainment value. For one, two of the matches feature Group F teams, which means they will in no way be entertaining, or even watchable, unless New Zealand scores early and tries to hang on to advance. The afternoon matches? Denmark-Japan should be called Battle of the Bleh, and the Netherlands has no need to exert itself against already-eliminated Cameroon considering they’ve clinched advancement and essentially the group as well. My advice? If you’re feeling the affects of consuming 40 matches in 13 days, just skip ‘em all and rest up for Brazil-Portugal and Spain-Chile on Friday, followed by United States and Ghana on Saturday.

Five thoughts - French Toast edition

1. Argentina is the best team in the world right now…

There are only three teams left who can still take the full nine points and equal Argentina’s flawless group stage performance. However, it’s really inconceivable that any can do so in such a dominating fashion as Maradona’s bunch. To coast to three consecutive wins is one thing – to do so with the best player in the world yet to score a goal is a thought that will keep opponents from sleeping at night.

A quick portrait of utter domination: According to Opta Sports, Argentina’s 82% time of possession against the Greeks was highest since the 1966 World Cup. Juan Sebastian Veron was both the architect and illustration of this one-sided romp, making an unheard-of 153 passes, also a post-1966 record. On the other side of the pitch was futility incarnate. Greece, a side in desperate need of a win (and therefore, goals) became the first team in this World Cup to be held without a shot in a half.

2. Nigeria has nobody but itself to blame…

If you didn’t know better, you’d think the Super Eagles had money against themselves in this tournament. Their inconsolable faces, however, told a different story – one a team that blew two 1-0 leads, earned a red card that cost them a game, and missed a shot into an open net from three yards out that would have rendered those other failures immaterial and started one of the biggest sport-induced parties a continent had ever seen.

Instead, after coughing up its second 1-0 early lead of the tournament, Yakubu Ayegbeni found himself simply needing to touch a ball into the net to level the score at two. His deflection wide was the howler of the tournament, a golden opportunity that even Peg Leg Pete couldn’t have squandered as poorly. Only minutes later, he earned a small level of redemption by converting a penalty kick to bring the score to 2-2, but it should have been the winner that sent Nigeria into the Round of 16.

3. South Africa can hold its head high…

Today simply confirmed what we all knew was coming – Bafana Bafana became the first host country to be eliminated in the group stage, a feat even more shocking upon realizing that even the United States escaped this sordid fate as hosts in 1994. Yes, it’s unfortunate, but it’s also the fate they accepted the day FIFA chose their bid – with their world ranking usually closer to 100 than 50.

They opened the scoring in Africa’s first Cup with a goal for the ages against Mexico, nearly pulling off an incredible upset before settling for an unexpected tie. Overpowered by a much stronger Uruguay team, they never gave up and finished as proud victors over a French squad in ruins.

Their only fault lies in their unfailing love for the worst sound ever created. BZZZZZZZZZZ.

4. But the French should hang theirs in shame…

The French picked up where they left off in the 2006 Cup – at least in terms of disgrace. The indelible image of that final will always be Zinedane Zidane trudging past the FIFA World Cup Trophy on his way to the locker room after The Headbutt.

The signs were there, especially after a 1-0 loss to China in a recent friendly. But nobody could have fully anticipated the havoc wreaked upon the French soccer program during the past two weeks. Two games came, zero goals went. Nicolas Anelka was sent home for calling (soon to be former) manager Ray Domenech “the son of a whore” at halftime of a 2-0 loss to Mexico. Soon thereafter, a training ground dispute ended with the team refusing to practice. That led to the exclusion of four mainstays from the South Africa starting lineup, including captain Patrice Evra. Ultimately, the humiliation was complete after a first-half red card kick-started a 2-1 win for the hosts and left the 2006 runners-up at the bottom of the standings in Group A.

5. Anything can happen tomorrow…

Tuesday’s matches saw Uruguay and Mexico virtually assured of qualifying in Group A and Argentina almost guaranteed to win Group B. Not Wednesday. With no clear leaders in Groups C and D, almost anything can happen. It’s not unrealistic to imagine Algeria – one of two teams yet to score a goal – advance with a win and a Slovakia win against England. Each of Slovakia, England, and the United States control their own destiny and can finish in the top two with a win Wednesday. The idea situation for the Americans would be a win coupled with an England win, securing first place an likely avoiding a game against Germany.

The Germans are still in good shape despite a shock defeat to Serbia in their second game. Their strong goal differential likely puts them in position to claim first with a win over Ghana, even if Serbia defeats Australia. Just as in Group C, the three best teams each need only a win to advance, while cellar dwellars Australia would most likely need a win while also avoiding a tie between Ghana and Germany. With no clear-cut favorites, it should be an entertaining four games, especially considering England and Germany are far closer to joining France in elimination than they possibly could have fathomed.